Hello torture my old friend

I went to the gym again yesterday for my induction session, which was relatively painless and really quite inspiring - as they tend to be I suppose.

My instructor's name escaped me so many times it became awkward asking for reminders so I've given up on that one, suffice to say he was a very nice young chap who clearly knew what he was talking about. I'd taken a list of priorities suggested by my personal trainer mate Neilon and the instructor (let's call him Troy for the sake of convenience) seemed happy enough to use Neilon's list as a framework. An hour later I emerged with the following list of exercises:

• Kettleball swing
• In to outs (using a machine to rotate the shoulder muscles)
• Out to ins
• Side plank
• Plank
• Swiss ball bridge (not elegant)
  
• Superman (where you kneel on all fours and extend opposite arms and legs simultaneously..it's a core strengthener)
• Press ups
• Chest presses
• Bent over row
• Cable row
• Shoulder press
• Tricep extension
• Kettleball squats
• Kettleball lunges

I tried all of these briefly when Troy was explaining what I had to do. I then did one full circuit, with just a single set of each exercise. It all felt reasonably within my capabilities (with one or two notable and slightly embarrassing exceptions - see below) and I went home feeling inspired and determined to fit in two visits to the gym each week from now on. For the record, I used the scales in the gym on my way out and it seems I'm almost exactly 13 stones, which is about 82.5 kilos. Let's see how that changes over the coming months.

I mentioned that there were some exceptions, the most excruciating one being press ups. I don't think I've done a proper press up for about two decades and I very much doubt I could manage a single proper one right now. I explained this to Troy with just a hint of pink in my cheeks and to his credit he didn't look stunned or burst out laughing, he just showed me some slightly easier options - starting with using a bench, or if that was too hard using the window sill, or if that was too hard using the wall, instead of the floor. Having to rely on these lesser options made me feel slightly emasculated in that room full of pumped up young muscle-heads but one has to start somewhere I suppose. When it came to actually doing the press ups during my circuit I could still manage just ten on the bench, which served to reinforce this feeling of mild inadequacy. It's silly, I know, but it's been years since I did anything in a gym that wasn't just cardiovascular and I suppose I'm adjusting to the deterioration there's been in my physical strength over that time. I'm coming to terms with the fact that I'm now a middle-aged bloke, not a young man. I've stayed reasonably fit and healthy, but by focusing exclusively on cycling, swimming and walking everywhere, none of which works anything like the range of muscles you'll address in an average session in the gym.

This morning I awoke with a full body's worth of aches and pains. Every single muscle group is complaining at varying volume levels. The worst pains are in my arse area when I sit down or stand up - that'll be the kettleball squats and lunges then. On the plus side there's no lower back pain, which is really encouraging. I have a long history of back trouble but (and I'm furiously touching wood here) it seems to be under control for now.

The other piece of news from yesterday is that I saw my GP, who gave me a clean bill of health for the ride. She wasn't sure about my blood pressure for a minute or two but a second reading showed it's fine. She advised me to include the lower back history, last year's broken arm and a cartilage operation in my left knee from a few years back on my TRAT form, but said I should be fine. So we're officially underway now. The only way is up.